Team Dreamin' 2011: NETS

At No Regard, we love basketball. We love the spectacle and strategy of the game, but sometimes the league's lack of imagination confounds and disappoints us. Call us optimists, visionaries, or kids who watched too much Space Jam, but we have ideas. Damn are we gonna share 'em.

It's no secret that the Nets are having trouble filling their roster. Jay, Prokhorov and Co. whiffed so hard on LeBron it would have embarrassed the Mighty Casey. David Lee realized he could never live in New Jersey with this photo drifting around the internet, and it's been rumored that Carlos Boozer is still laughing at the Nets' offer.


Well sports fans, that was it. New Jersey ran through Plans A, B, and C, and have made it all the way down to Plan K. By this we mean Kevin Daley, aka Special K, the superstar of your friendly neighborhood Harlem Globetrotters.

Yes, that's right. For the 2010-2011 season, the Nets should sign a Harlem Globetrotter.

Seriously, why not? Could anyone have been less fun to watch than Bobby Simmons? Did you watch that video? He makes the ref wear a ball as a hat. Not only is this what the Nets should be doing at this juncture, it is perhaps the only thing they can do. (They just signed Jordan Farmar.) I mean just imagine if an actual professional sports team adopted the tactic of simply annoying the absolute bejesus out of any and all opponents. Trick passes, bounce shots, and special timeouts for knock-knock jokes, in the end, a thin crowd of kids and parents could laugh and enjoy themselves. Sounds like a typical night at the IZOD Center, only fun.

I'd love to see this happen almost as much as I'd love to see Avery Johnson hand out orange slices during timeouts. Alas, I fear the Brick City Nets take themselves entirely too seriously to entertain such antics. They should at least invite Daley out to Newark for a workout. When he's not busy clowning, dude can seriously ball.