Friday, October 12, 2012

No Regard Presidential Previews: Boston Celtics (George Washington)

Oh the season. Oh the season! Election or NBA, both are upon us. We're getting into the spirit by bringing you our season previews (with a little help from the presidents). One per day for the next 30 days—which will bring us to the Day of Reckoning. So please join us on the campaign trail as we shake hands, kiss babies and sink jumpers.


"An army of asses led by a lion is vastly superior to an army of lions led by an ass." - George Washington

It is difficult to imagine what it would have been like to be one of Washington's soldiers the morning orders were given that the Delaware River was to be forged. 

"Get your mittens on and load up that musket, Washington says we're sneaking into Trenton to surprise the Brits. Apparently, they're all sleeping.

"Come again, bro?" 

Put yourself in their shoes: Instead of heading home to your wife and a deliciously cooked Christmas ham, you now have to pack three days worth of food, wear two pairs of socks and cross a frigid river, avoiding huge chunks of ice in a crappy wooden rowboat along the way. Oh yeah, you probably do not know how to swim and arm floaties have not hit the shelves of Toys 'R' Us yet. 

You would have to feel pretty strongly about General Washington to be willing to to go ahead with such a wacky move. 

That blind faith and belief in leadership is not so different than the sort of compassion and trust that the players on the Celtics feel for their fiery leader, Doc Rivers. Rivers has such a hold over this group that he got KG to play three more years, morphed a once very raw Rondo into one of the league's most game-changing players, convinced Jason Terry to join the corps and put together a group that bloggers and pundits suggest, each preseason, should be butchered by their opponents. 

But, each year, they're not, just like Washington's upstart soldiers were not ravaged by the Redcoats.  Although I cannot be sure, (I am not on the Celtics, unfortunately) I am convinced that one of the main reasons this group loves Rivers so much is because, like them, Rivers was a player—he knows what it is like to live the life of an NBA baller. And although I cannot be sure (I was not alive during Washington's presidency, fortunately) I imagine one of the main reasons Washington was such a popular president was because he was a soldier and general before taking office.

Just as there are multiple ways to skin a cat, there are many different methods to leading. The most important tool for a coach, general or president, though, is knowing that the group of individuals you are in charge of will do anything you feel necessary. Even if it means possibly drowning and becoming a watery corpse while trying to get to Trenton via a big river. Or in the case of this years Celtics, being assured that your players will get on board with a potential starting five that might include Darko, which is perhaps Rivers' most impressive accomplishment yet.   

Rushed Pull-Up Jumpers

Pokemon who the team should adopt as its new mascot:
Drowzee


Headline we’ll be most sick of reading: "Injuries Prevent Championship Aspirations For Aging Celtics"

Headline we’re most looking forward to: "Celtics Force a Game Seven With Miami in Eastern Conference Finals"

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you enter the pearly gates?: "Sorry, but I have to let Ray in also, guys. I mean, did you see He Got Game?  Dude can act."

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