This weekend marks the end of the NBA Summer League, which has been somewhat overshadowed by bigger news events of the past month. If you have NBA TV, $14.95, or access to illegal sports streaming sites, though, you're likely privy to some of the wonderful things that have been happening in first Orlando and now Las Vegas. But if you've been in the dark, worry not! It's never too late to tune in and get your drink on to the sight of a bunch of babies playing basketball. Here are the rules for this Summer League Weekend-Long Happy Hour:DRINK ANYTIME:
- Landry Fields does something unexpectedly good.
- John Wall does something unexpectedly bad.
- Devin Ebanks and Derrick Caracter make you realize the Lakers will probably win again next year.
- Javale McGee jumps
- An announcer says "Cartier Martin".
- J.J. Hickson embarrasses a defender.
- You learn something personal about a player that will probably not get a contract.
- A player is compared to a current non-All-Star.
- LeBron is mentioned during the Heat-Cavs game.
- The Henry Winkler reverse mortgage commercial comes on.
- The Shake Weight for Men commercial comes on.
FINISH YOUR BEER ANYTIME:
- DeMar DeRozan literally makes your jaw drop.
- You see a player putting on a backpack.
- An announcer makes a Summer League Coach of the Year joke.
- Omar Samhan's face says, "Fuck you."
- DeMarcus Cousins takes a hit that would make you cry.
TAKE A SHOT ANYTIME:
- You think to yourself, "You know what, the D-League team might be able to beat the regular Clippers roster."
- Jeremy Lin does the most adorable thing you've ever seen.
- You are forced to hit rewind on your DVR.
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