No Regard Presidential Previews: Miami Heat (Barack Obama)

Oh the season. Oh the season! Election or NBA, both are upon us. We're getting into the spirit by bringing you our season previews (with a little help from the presidents). One per day for the next 30 days—which will bring us to the Day of Reckoning. So please join us on the campaign trail as we shake hands, kiss babies and sink jumpers.

“If you turn away now – if you buy into the cynicism that the change we fought for isn't possible… well, change will not happen.” - Barack Obama

Grand, unreasonable promises were made. Optimistic mantras were turned into sarcastic comments on early failures. Change is within reach, but uncertain.

With LeBron’s megalomaniacal aspirations and the Ray Allen injection, this Miami Heat season will almost definitely avoid the lame duck championship hangover. These guys have survived a first term filled with rabid naysayers yelling about broken promises, but you can only win so many championships each year. And now they are ready to chase history. LeBron is unhinged and Bosh has settled in to his role (which is photobombing). Wade’s health is, as always, a question mark, but how much does that matter anymore? Mike Miller is dead, and Rashard Lewis is alive.

Let’s prematurely crown them once again and fast forward to their kind-of-inevitable Finals matchup with the Lakers: The decisive battleground in The Positional Revolution. Will Coach Spo, the unassuming up-ender of basketball mores, continue leading the path towards positional irrelevance? Or will he bend to the Lakers’ size and play five guys with different heights? Does he have the personnel to even make that choice? Will he start wearing the backwards hat during games?

Rushed Pull-Up Jumpers

Pokemon who the team should adopt as its new mascot: Team Rocket

Headline we'll be most sick of reading: “LeBron shows once again why he is finally the best player in the game.”

Headline we're most looking forward to: “Super Nintendo Chalmers Something Something Something Something.”

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you enter the pearly gates?: “Jesus, you guys really are fun to watch.”

A Rebel King with a Cause

In an election year during which the incumbent uses his basketball fandom to gain "everyman" status, it's hard not to think about politics with every pass of the ball, every shot through the hoop, every board ripped down from the glass. Sports are a part of our national fabric as much as, if not more than, debates, primaries, and straw polls.

Several weeks ago, I was pointed to an article about Harrison Barnes in The Atlantic titled "Moneyballer." It was sent by a friend, arguing—incorrectly, if you ask me—against college basketball players being paid, using Barnes' self-branding strategy as an example of how colleges offer enough opportunity already. One nod to Barnes' generally infuriating self-branding decisions particularly got my goat. You've probably heard others complain about it:

Although he founded a Bible-study group in high school and paid particularly close attention when he met Barack Obama before a game aboard a U.S. aircraft carrier earlier this season, he’s reluctant to discuss either experience. “Anytime you want to get into religious or political views,” he said, choosing his words carefully, “that can instantly polarize people.” (In this he seems also to be following in the footsteps of Jordan, who, when asked why he wouldn’t endorse Harvey Gantt in a Senate race against Jesse Helms two decades ago, reportedly answered, “Republicans buy sneakers, too.”)

I railed against Barnes for days, cursed the evilness of MJ's legacy, and lamented the lack of personalized, political passion in the world of athletics—at least from the most meaningful members of that world. But a week and a half ago, a link to a photo you've probably seen by now showed up on my timeline and made me realize that, just maybe, there's been a one-man rebellion growing right under our noses.

The Audacity of Z-Bo

The 2006-2007 Golden State Warriors were what I assume LSD is like. The experience of watching Don Nelson, Baron Davis and Stephen Jackson hijack the league for 12 days was mind-expanding in a way you normally only read about in Jack Kerouac books. And their "We Believe" mantra was fitting for a team trying to change the world during Obama's campaign. Nelson's lineup choices were as strong as Obama's email list, and Boom Dizzle's refusal to be anything less than great was downright presidential. Plus, there's a connection to be made somewhere between the flag lapel pin and the bullet fedora.

As much as that team stood for hope and change in a dedicated sports city that needed it, during an era that was starved for it, their breakup and subsequent waning also paralleled Barack's own struggle to unite and lead during his first term. Both promised a few too many revolutions to be able to follow through. Warriors fans must have felt like the ostracized LGBT community as they watched broken promises turn into missed playoffs.

But as Obama begins his second campaign, NBA fans have been gifted another team in which to place our optimism for a better world: The Memphis Grizzlies.

NBA Happy Hour: FIBA Semifinals and Finals

TGIF basketball fans! It's the end of the week, so that means NBA Happy Hour, our almost-weekly basketball drinking game! Grab a beer, follow the rules and start the weekend with a Don Nelson-level buzz.

The FIBA World Championships have been great fun. We all know this. It's given us basketball games in a European soccer match atmosphere. It's given us one last, clear look at Tiago Splitter before he finally walks through the NBA's front door this season. It's given Louis Scola a very large stage on which to perform very strongly and this weekend, it all comes down to Turkey-Serbia-USA-Lithuania.

So grab a beer and drink...

100 Reasons to Watch the NBA This Season, Part 1

Reason #97: The Taco Bell NBA Big Box Commercial

We told you this would happen. To celebrate our first 100 posts, we're giving back. We've put together 100 reasons to watch this season. Consider these a mouthwash for this off-season of stink. Some can be considered predictions, some are sure things, and some may just be hopes that will fade before the schedule is even released. Whatever the case, read them all and get excited again. Remember, reasons #101 through infinity belong in the comments section. Don't know if you can tell, but we're excited to finally be able to watch some ball.

100. To Witness Second Chances.
Can underachieving talents like Michael Beasley and Greg Oden find a whole new NBA life in their respective change of scenery and relative health? Or will they continue to fall short of expectations?

99. Speaking of Second Chances, Gil.
Can our man use the beginning of the John Wall era to bring him back to some of his wild, unpredictable, unstoppable glory? It could be tough for him to give up the team, but if he's smart, he'll allow Wall to be his redeemer.

98. Barack Obama.
With his Bulls primed to make a real run in the East, expect to hear more of 44's thoughts on the NBA. And let's hope so, because dude needs something to take his mind off things for a minute.

97. The Taco Bell NBA Big Box Commercial.
We hope we get new versions of this commercial, but if it doesn't return, no worries. We're sure to get some ad that's just as harmlessly enjoyable and forever goofy in its place.

Yeeesssssss! We Can

The deadpan humor here is top-notch on both sides and you know Obama didn't need any prepping for this interview; he is so at ease talking about basketball. But mostly, I just love hearing our president say "the league" and be talking about our league.

Bibby's World: The Best Thing Ever by Mike Bibby

Don't know how we locked this down, but we'd like to introduce you to No Regard's newest blogging sensation... Mike Bibby! He'll be checking in whenever he can, just to remind us: It's Bibby's World, we just live in it!





Hey Internet World! It's me, Mike Bibby, making my very first blog entry!

To first address the 500 lb gorilla in the room, I would like to say that getting swept by the Orlando Magic in Round 2 of the playoffs was unfortunate. Not so much in the way of me personally wanting to win the Championship, but the loss has been quite tough on my teammates, so that's no fun. Actually, to be quite honest, I was getting kind of tired of all the games. In my opinion, each game of the playoffs should have a different variation on the sport. So, like, Game 1 is just normal basketball BUT Game 2 is like a round of Horse or Around The World or even Bowling or whatever. If that were the case, I think it'd be a lot less boring. But people are afraid of change, so what's the point in even getting heated about it.

Anyway, since the 'ousting' of my team, as the news media likes to call it, I've had a lot of free time on my hands. Not only that, but since the laying off of our coach Mike Woodson, he and I have had the chance to spend more time together as friends. He's a guy that I've wanted to hang out with for some time now, and let me just say, it's been sensational. Since our game 4 defeat, we've been on a week-long bender of quality time: drinking mojitos in our pajamas, frisbee scrimmages, and playing the Starcraft 2 Beta for literally 16 hours straight. We've let absolutely nothing get in the way of our happiness and have found wonder and amazement in even the smallest of places. Which brings me to the point of this post: The New Dominos Pizza Recipe!



Wow!

To bring back what I said before about people being afraid of change, I would like to say to those people, "GET OVER IT!" Between The New Dominos Pizza Recipe, touch screen phones and Barack Obama, I think we've proven that change is good! A garlic-herb seasoning, mozzarella with a hint of provolone, and a bolder tomato sauce with a red pepper kick?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Coach and I have eaten, like, a billion of these things in the past 6 days alone. They go great with EVERYTHING, from fishing to just hanging out on a Saturday morning to Ryan Reynolds movie marathons (Van Wilder + X-Men Origins: Wolverine + Smokin' Aces BACK TO BACK TO BACK! I dare you to beat that!).


Excellent.

I know some of you are thinking to yourselves, "Mike, are you crazy? It's just pizza!" But I'm not crazy. I'm passionate about a lot of things in my life (break dancing movies, Mr. Pibb, my Zune - THEY'RE BETTER THAN IPODS, PEOPLE!!!, castles, pre-washed jeans, etc.) but the thing that takes the number one spot for me is pizza, and Dominos has found a way to make that thing absolutely perfect. It's not just better, it's PERFECT. Don't take my word for it; try it for yourself! Oh, and uh... You're welcome, World!

I leave you folks with this saying I just came up with:

If you can't enjoy the little things, then there's something wrong with your big picture. Don't be afraid to dream big. But just remember, your dreams will come true if they are small enough!

- Mike

And now, the funniest thing I've ever seen:

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