Record: 2-2
I refuse to bore you with the details of why I haven't been able to watch my favorite team, the Boston Celtics, this year. You've got the Internet: You're familiar with weather, democracy and whatever other dumb excuse I have for not keeping up with Rajon and the gang.
To make up for it, here's a summary of their season so far. I might not have watched the games, but like you, I've got the Internet and I've got some functioning eyeballs.
The only thing you need to know about the season opener down in Miami is that KG refused to acknowledge Walter Ray Allen. I love Garnett. When the man says's he lost someone's phone number, you best believe him. Sure, Jesus hit his first corner three immediately after the interaction and then scored a bunch of points. And yes, the Heat won, but winning isn't everything, okay? I'm good with this game, 81 to go!!
I am not good with game two. Losing a home opener to a pack of hapless vagabonds like the Bucks is not championship-level material. Here's what happened: Jeff Green is back and registered a +/- of -16. Damnit. At least promising rookie-big-boy Sullinger is getting out there! He'll put the tank top on and box some people out. His six points, seven boards and most impressive 100 percent field goal shooting (2/2) was the only positive on the night. Forget the gold-medal-wearing Anthony Davis, Sullinger is clear the prized pig of this year's rookie class.
Okay, don't panic 0-2, but 80 games to go! (I know, this seems like a super-long schedule, it baffled me too. So I did some research and it turns out there were so few games last season because of something called a "lockout." As I understand it, the players and owners were arguing over who should get paid more as well as what color Gatorade they'd fill the orange jugs with on the sidelines and so they cancelled some games. Most NBA seasons are, in fact, 82 games. You're welcome for the information, by the way. That's why I get paid to do this.)
(I don't get paid to do this.)
Anyway, surely a home-and-home with the bottom-feeding Washington Wizards is exactly what the Doctor ordered. The Truth, baby! Pierce nets 27 and the Cs eek out a 89-86 win. We won't go into why they were only able to put up 89 on a team that I'm pretty sure if you started me against I'd be able to at least score a layup. My tactic would be just to cherry pick—play no defense whatsoever and stand under the opposing team's basket right outside the paint. As soon as the Wizards scored, I'd scream for Rondo to football-style pass me the rock. Assuming the pressure didn't make me crumble, I think I'd go backboard and finish the bucket. It's not like I'm helping defend anyway, so I feel like this is our best chance for success.
Why hasn't a team tried that, yet, seriously?
One more game: Washington again, this time in chilly Massachusetts. This has to be a cake walk, or a walk in the park, whichever walking metaphor you prefer. Overtime victory?! Exciting, yes, but also concerning. The story here is Rondo, though, who continues to play chess while the rest of the league's point guard corps is playing Candyland: 18 points, four rebounds, 14 assists and three steals. Back to .500. Breathe easy.
Onto Philadelphia this Friday night and a chance to finally reach the elusive winning-record mark. If I can't watch because of a third mutant-style storm, I'll definitely recap the game. Let's go Celtics!
Your strategy for scoring against the Wizards has been tried in the NBA - every night by Mike D'Antoni. Celts will be there at the end.
ReplyDeleteFuture coach of the Lakers (I hope)! Agree on Boston, they'll turn it on in March and get the 4 seed.
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