If You Can't Join 'Em, Join 'Em

Great Scott! Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Comin' in hot!! 

It's July 2012 folks, the hot, hot chips are cooking, the earth is slowly cooking us and a postmodern NBA is our reality.


Not only does the best player walking God's green earth find himself eagerly awaiting the arrival of some fancy new golden-thing he'll eventually wrap around one of his fingers, but Steve Nash is going to be furiously dribbling a ball for the Los Angeles Lakers starting in October of this year. (I'm serious.) 

We make no bones about who we like over here at No Regard, so we'll say it again like we've said it thousands (literally) of times before: We like Steve Nash. He's super fun to watch play this wonky game, he loves soccer and beer, advocates for important social issues and was the most critical piece of the elaborate engine that was the Phoenix Suns "Seven seconds or less" offense. (We miss you Mike D. Come back soon.)

So how do we feel about Nash joining up with Kobe Bryant, Andrew Bynum and some other very large men who wear gold tank-tops to work? 

We feel good. 

"Yeah, yeah," you may be muttering to yourself, "If you like him so much why don't you marry him?" and "Why do you only feel good about Nash having a legit shot at getting his own piece of ridiculously expensive jewelry designed specifically to wrap around one's finger?" 

I won't even dignify your first question with a response (we have girlfriends, and that's cheating, jerk) and as for your second smartass comment, well we're just a little concerned about Grant Hill, dummy.  What will the lovable turkey-bacon cook do without his buddy Steve around? 

Also, this whole "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" mentality might influence Walter Ray Allen. And if there's one thing this writer doesn't want, it's Walter Ray Allen shooting basketballs into a metal rim wearing a black, sleeveless shirt that says "Heat" on the front of it.