With the lockout here, and here to stay, we have the sad prospect of no NBA games for quite some time. Instead of dwelling on the politics, finance and bullshit that's all conspired to strip our favorite league from us, we've decided to look on the bright side. New careers for our beloved NBA superstars! And what better place to look for these new ventures than Craigslist, a Website where wacky jobs are numerous and sometimes even real. Since they've already given us so much, we've taken the initiative to try and help these unemployed athletes find a new calling.Craigslist Posting
9/13/2011, Sacramento, CA, Solar Installer
"Seeking residential solar installer to work with established company. Position is based in Sacramento but territory covers all of northern California. Ideally candidate will have some solar experience or experience in traditional trades. Job requires a lot of travel. Candidate must be willing to stay out of town for most of the week. Duties will include but not limited to the following: Installing residential grid-tied photo-voltaic systems under supervision of lead installer. Organizing shop and assisting with shop duties when needed including receiving new shipments. Must have a good work ethic and able to stay on task until the job is done."
Why He Should Apply
Picture the following scenario for a hot minute: You're a California resident inspired by the nation's recent surge into the solar movement. You want to do your part to help prevent the earth from crumbling at the cruel hands of human-created global warming. So you decide to order solar panels for your house. It's a strong move. You feel good about it.
The next week the delivery truck pulls up, and who hops out? Yeah, DeMarcus Cousins, the feisty power forward on your favorite NBA team, the Sacramento Kings. Does he know what "grid-tied photo voltaic systems" are? Maybe not, but neither do you, right? So relax. Does he have a "good work ethic and can stay on task until a job is done"? you best your ass he can, Mr./Mrs. solar panel purchaser.
9/13/2011, Sacramento, CA, Solar Installer
"Seeking residential solar installer to work with established company. Position is based in Sacramento but territory covers all of northern California. Ideally candidate will have some solar experience or experience in traditional trades. Job requires a lot of travel. Candidate must be willing to stay out of town for most of the week. Duties will include but not limited to the following: Installing residential grid-tied photo-voltaic systems under supervision of lead installer. Organizing shop and assisting with shop duties when needed including receiving new shipments. Must have a good work ethic and able to stay on task until the job is done."
Why He Should Apply
Picture the following scenario for a hot minute: You're a California resident inspired by the nation's recent surge into the solar movement. You want to do your part to help prevent the earth from crumbling at the cruel hands of human-created global warming. So you decide to order solar panels for your house. It's a strong move. You feel good about it.
The next week the delivery truck pulls up, and who hops out? Yeah, DeMarcus Cousins, the feisty power forward on your favorite NBA team, the Sacramento Kings. Does he know what "grid-tied photo voltaic systems" are? Maybe not, but neither do you, right? So relax. Does he have a "good work ethic and can stay on task until a job is done"? you best your ass he can, Mr./Mrs. solar panel purchaser.
What He Should Wear to the Interview
Obviously.
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