If You See Something, Say Something: Double Standard

IYSSSS is our semi-regular Internet intelligence report, a liberal arts approach to following the NBA on the Web. E-mail us at jewsforjesusshuttlesworth@gmail.com if you've got any suggestions.

Brain on Funk Tumblr: So, I have just been made aware that Doc Funk is back captioning for the playoffs. This is honestly the only way I can think of for these playoffs to get even better.

@JohnCTownsend: I would imagine Gilbert finds it a little frustrating that everyone else is allowed is allowed to do finger gunz. Poor Gilbert.

Bethlehem Shoals at GQ's Balls Out Blog: Shoals' work at his GQ-housed playoff blog has been great all the way around, and is the current URL at which to find his best work and visit daily, but this conversation with David Roth (contributor to The Wall Street Journal and The Awl) is particularly strong. From their digression about Chris Webber's color commentary:

Shoals: He always takes risks. In the studio, it's being vulnerable. On the call, it's cutting loose in weird, creative ways that have as much to do with confidence and intelligence as they do with a lack of experience. It's like watch Walt Frazier find himself, but the floor's on fire and nobody has any idea how they got here in the first place.

Roth: His malaprops are basically psychedelic, but he makes some good calls—Indiana and Denver as mirror images of each other was an on-the-fly gem he just tossed off between weird syntactic decisions—and I think he's doing great. He leverages his credibility in a really interesting way.

Bill Simmons: Despite the monstrous word count and tired references to "The Real World" that have come to define Simmons' writing, this new joint on small market teams—specifically the Kings—is a pretty fair and restrained look at the borderline crisis the NBA is facing. Worth a skim. He also makes a Thelma & Louise reference, which was shocking, because I always thought the only movies Simmons had ever seen were Rounders, Boogie Nights, Shawshank Redemption, Top Gun and Cocktail (the last of which he does reference here). The over/under on how many movies he's seen has to be 12. (I love using Simmons gimmicks when writing about him.)